Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
