I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize