some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
