waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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