Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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