CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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