He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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