when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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