duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
