Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
