I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
