Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
