I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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