I want to have your abortion
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
