haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
My pussy is not your playground.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
