I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
