Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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