You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
