dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
