I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
