I hate your face
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
he was CRYING into my vagina
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
