OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
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