He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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