I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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