I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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