I could have mohawked her pubes.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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