is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
