She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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