I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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