it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
