So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
