If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Do you still have your period?
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Randomize
