My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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