No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
