you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
