I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
