hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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