so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
