I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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