i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
