real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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