If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
