I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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