You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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