I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
