After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
