your parents love me but you hate me
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
