True but thats because hes a fetus.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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