People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
PANTIES FOUND
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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