I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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