i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
