Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
